Friday, January 18, 2008
I needed that. Except louder and deeper. I’m writing this after coming home from my daughter’s baby shower. It was a very nice shower. That’s not what I’m screaming on paper about at all.
This is January of a whole new year. I had such hopes for 2008. Still do. I feel that every day can and should be a new beginning. Right now, I’m warning “it” that so far I’m unimpressed with the demeanor it has shown so far.
Hopefully, by the time you read this our grandson still is able to turn one without becoming a big brother. But with our family’s history of early births you never know. Sarah was opening gifts between contractions, the baby had “dropped” and she hadn’t sleep in several nights. Not due to the baby moving (although “Aidan” is probably going to be a soccer player), but she’s rightfully worried about what’s going on in her life.
My son-in-law came home a few days ago with news no adult wants to give, or have happen, EVER-he was laid off from his underwriting job.
What a way to start a new year: Sarah has been considered “high risk” during this pregnancy. She was laid off from her underwriting job one month after she found out she was pregnant the first time. She hasn’t had the health (or time, with another high risk pregnancy) to find another job. Her husband hasn’t been able to find a stable position since that same faithful date.
Not his fault whatsoever-it’s the real estate industry.
As I sit here, the mother of two adults, I realize I’ll never stop worrying about either’s welfare and happiness. It’s in the genes. My mother still worries about my sister and I. And, let’s face it, even though my dear sister is 6 years younger, we’re not exactly little kids anymore.
Stress is running high in not only Sarah’s home but ours as well. We’re worried about my daughter’s health, the baby’s health, my son-in-law, their finances (actually the lack there of) and their future in general. They even swallowed their pride and went to the welfare office to sign up for subsidies.
Guess what? They cannot qualify for any of them because they make a slight bit more than the maximum in unemployment payments. Then the woman who was helping them suggested this piece of advice: “You know if you weren’t married you’d qualify for all the programs we have to offer”.
Both my daughter and son-in-law couldn’t believe their ears-they were being penalized by being having a family while married!
It seems when bad things happen no one and nothing is spared. In life, things can change in a single breath, in a single moment-may the next one taken in by our daughter is a good deep one. So deep that when she exhales-it’s becomes even stronger. May it be so strong that she’s able to blow away all this present sad luck and not only give birth to a healthy baby but to some better fortune.