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Thursday, February 18, 2016


The Loss of Someone is Never Easy

Last night we had some very, very sad news.  Our son Adam called and said "Did you check your Facebook?  Kari died!"

Kari (last name deliberately being left off) was one of our parents in our Day Care years ago.  She came to us via another of our great families.  She and her then husband really wanted children and went through quite a bit to become pregnant with their first son Ryan.  Kari, always a tall, beautiful lady with a huge smile and heart was a joy to see walking in every morning.

When Tyler, number 2 son, came along, they were all definitely part of our "extended" family.  They were wonderful boys. 

Not that it made a hoot of difference to anyone but Kari had alopecia-so she was always creating the most beautiful ways with various fabrics to adorn her head.   Regal, elegant-that's how I remember her, as well as her talents as a mom.

When she became pregnant with her third son, Cooper, I was in a pretty sad state with my RA and let everyone know of our shutting down the center.  We were all crushed, but alas, there was no choice in the decision.

We stayed in touch through the years, her seeing that I was finally using my writing talents, her starting her own business with her head-dressing skills.  Then her posts tapered off and we moved out here to AZ.  Lost track.

I had no idea that she and Adam friended one another until his phone call last night.

He said he thought it was cancer.  I reminded him that she had always been quite healthy that her lack of hair was not something fatal.  Then I read the memorial invitation asking that in lieu of flowers would people please donate to City of Hope.

Kari was in her early 40's, her kids now teens.  I wanted to send condolences but there was no page to post.  I went in circles for a while trying to find a way to send a note to the boys that, no doubt, don't remember their day care provider, but I did my best.

A beautiful soul, a wonderful woman and mom and she's gone.

Years ago I read a poem that said, "How long you'll be missed":

Get a bucket and fill it water, put your hand in it up to your wrist, pull it out and the hole that's remaining is a measure of how much you'll be missed.

You may splash all you please when you enter, you may stir up the water galore, but once out you'll see quite quickly it will look quite the same as before."

With Kari-this is simply not so.  She will be missed by so many and our memories and stories will make sure she'll live on.

I was very sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. She sounded like such a very nice person. My thoughts are with her family.
Mine as well. So very sad
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